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Preaching at a funeral

Funeral sermon outlines: 5 messages of hope for different losses

Five funeral sermon outlines, each with its Scripture, structure and sample lines: for a faithful believer, a sudden or tragic death, a long life, a person whose faith is unknown, and a child. Written for pastors and for lay leaders who have been asked to speak.

By Jon Horton · Updated

A funeral sermon is not an ordinary sermon. The people in front of you are tired, in shock, and listening for one thing: is there anything true I can hold onto? Your job is not to explain the death. It is to tell the truth about the person, to say that God is near, and to give the family a few simple words of hope.

The five funeral sermon outlines below cover the situations pastors and lay leaders are asked about most. Each one gives you a Scripture, a structure you can follow, and a few sample lines to borrow or change. All Scripture is quoted from the King James Version, which is in the public domain. Theology and practice vary by tradition, so adapt these to your own, and to what the family has asked.

Before you write a funeral sermon

The quality of the sermon depends mostly on what you learn before you write. Ask the family these questions:

  • Tell me about them. What would you want everyone here to know?
  • What did they love? What made them laugh?
  • Did they have a favorite hymn, verse or saying?
  • Is there anything you hope I will not say?
  • Who are the closest people, and who will be hardest hit?

Write down two or three of their phrases, exactly. Use them. A sermon that quotes the family’s own words sounds like it was written for this person, because it was.

Outline 1 of 5

A life finished well

For: A faithful believer who died after a life of visible faith

Scripture
2 Timothy 4:6–8
Length
10 to 15 minutes
The aim
Give thanks for a faithful life and anchor the hope of the family in Christ, not in the person’s goodness.
I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith: henceforth there is laid up for me a crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, shall give me at that day. (KJV)

Structure

  1. 1

    Open with the person, briefly

    • Name them and name one or two ways their faith showed up in daily life: a pew they sat in, a casserole they carried.
    • Say what the family has already said this week. Borrow their words, not yours.
  2. 2

    A life poured out (v. 6)

    • Paul says “I am now ready to be offered.” A faithful life is given away over decades, in small things.
    • Tell a short story that shows this person giving something away: time, money, patience.
  3. 3

    A race run to the end (v. 7)

    • “I have finished my course.” Faith is a long obedience, not one moment.
    • Name the hard seasons they kept going through, without detail they would not want shared.
  4. 4

    A crown laid up (v. 8)

    • The crown is a gift from the righteous Judge, not a wage. Our hope is in Christ’s faithfulness.
    • “Not to me only, but unto all them also that love his appearing”: the promise is for everyone here.
  5. 5

    Close with an invitation and a blessing

    • Invite the grieving to lean on the Shepherd. Invite the rest to ask what they are running toward.
    • Offer a short prayer of thanks and send the family out with John 14:27 (“Peace I leave with you”).

Sample lines

Walter would hate me making a fuss. So I’ll just tell you what he did. He showed up. For forty years, he showed up.
Notice what Paul does not say. He does not say, “I have been perfect.” He says, “I have kept the faith.” That is the part we can borrow.
The crown is a gift. If you want to honor Walter today, receive the same gift he did.

Outline 2 of 5

God near the brokenhearted

For: A sudden or tragic death: accident, heart attack, illness without warning

Scripture
Psalm 34:18 with John 11:35 and Romans 8:38–39
Length
8 to 12 minutes
The aim
Tell the truth that this is wrong and hard, say that God does not leave, and give people one thing to hold tonight.
The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit. (Psalm 34:18, KJV)

Structure

  1. 1

    Name what happened without explaining it

    • Say plainly that this was sudden and that nothing about it feels right. Do not hurry past that.
    • Give permission: shock, anger, silence, tears. All of it is allowed.
  2. 2

    Jesus wept (John 11:35)

    • Jesus stood at the tomb of Lazarus knowing what He would do, and still wept.
    • If Jesus grieved, grief is not a lack of faith.
  3. 3

    The LORD is nigh (Psalm 34:18)

    • God does not promise to explain. He promises to come close.
    • Where is God today? In this room, in the people who came, in the hands that are already helping.
  4. 4

    Nothing can separate (Romans 8:38–39)

    • Death is the biggest thing we face, and Paul lists it first. It is not bigger than the love of God.
    • This is a promise about God’s grip on us, not about our feelings.
  5. 5

    What to do tonight

    • Give three small, practical instructions: eat something, call one person, sleep when you can.
    • Close with a short prayer for the family by name.

Sample lines

I am not going to tell you why. I don’t know why. I do know that God is not standing at a distance.
There is a sentence in the Bible that is only two words long. “Jesus wept.” If you only remember one thing I say today, remember that one.

Outline 3 of 5

Teach us to number our days

For: A long life: a grandparent or elder who died in old age

Scripture
Psalm 90:10–12
Length
10 to 12 minutes
The aim
Give thanks for the years, honor the wisdom of a long life, and encourage the living to use their days well.
So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom. (Psalm 90:12, KJV)

Structure

  1. 1

    The sweep of the years

    • Walk through the life in a few decades. Where they were born, what they saw change, whom they loved.
    • Choose three images, not a full biography. Memory is better than a list.
  2. 2

    Gratitude is the right first feeling

    • Thank God for each year. A long life is a gift to a family and a congregation.
    • It is fine to grieve and be glad in the same breath.
  3. 3

    The wisdom of the long life

    • Name two or three things this person knew that younger people are still learning.
    • “The hoary head is a crown of glory, if it be found in the way of righteousness.” (Proverbs 16:31, KJV)
  4. 4

    Number your days

    • Psalm 90:12 is a prayer, not a threat. Ask God to teach us what to do with our time.
    • Invite everyone to do one thing this week that the person would have done: write a letter, make a call, bring a meal.
  5. 5

    Hope beyond the years

    • The best years are not behind us. Read Revelation 21:4 and close with prayer.

Sample lines

Ninety-four years. She saw radios become televisions, and televisions become telephones that live in a pocket. And through it all, she kept making the same biscuits.
It is not sad that she lived to be old. It is a gift. It is sad that we have to say goodbye. Both are true.

Outline 4 of 5

Into the hands of a merciful God

For: The person’s faith is unknown or uncertain, or the family is mixed

Scripture
Psalm 103:8–14
Length
8 to 10 minutes
The aim
Comfort the living honestly, entrust the person to God’s mercy, and neither claim nor deny what you cannot know.
Like as a father pitieth his children, so the LORD pitieth them that fear him. For he knoweth our frame; he remembereth that we are dust. (Psalm 103:13–14, KJV)

Structure

  1. 1

    Begin with what we know

    • We know this person was loved. We know they were a gift. We can say what was good about them with joy.
    • Every good gift is from God (James 1:17, KJV: “Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above”). You can give thanks for it without any further claim.
  2. 2

    What we do not know

    • Say plainly that you do not know the state of this person’s heart before God, and that only God does.
    • “Shall not the Judge of all the earth do right?” (Genesis 18:25, KJV)
  3. 3

    A God who knows our frame (Psalm 103)

    • The LORD is slow to anger and plenteous in mercy. He remembers that we are dust.
    • We can entrust the person to that mercy and rest there.
  4. 4

    Comfort for those who remain

    • Speak to the family’s grief directly. Their sorrow does not need a verdict.
    • Offer the hope Christians have: Christ is risen, and no one is beyond His care.
  5. 5

    A gentle invitation

    • Invite each person to consider their own trust in God. Do not push. Do not preach at the dead.

Sample lines

I did not know James well enough to know what he believed in the quiet of his heart. I know this much: he was loved, and he loved. And I know the God who made him is kinder than most of us imagine.
We do not come today to give a verdict. We come to give thanks, to say goodbye, and to entrust James to the One who knows him better than any of us.

Outline 5 of 5

He gathers the lambs

For: The death of a child, including a baby or a stillbirth. Handle with great care.

Scripture
Isaiah 40:11 and Mark 10:13–16
Length
5 to 8 minutes. Shorter is kinder.
The aim
Say very little, say it gently, name the child, and leave room for the parents’ sorrow. Do not try to make this make sense.
He shall feed his flock like a shepherd: he shall gather the lambs with his arm, and carry them in his bosom. (Isaiah 40:11, KJV)

Structure

  1. 1

    Say the child’s name and one true thing

    • Use the child’s name early and often. Speak about their real life, however short.
    • If the child was an infant, speak of the days the family had: the nursery, the name, the hopes.
  2. 2

    Acknowledge that this is wrong

    • It is against the order of things for parents to bury a child. Say so plainly.
    • Do not try to fix anything.
  3. 3

    Jesus and the children (Mark 10:13–16)

    • Jesus was indignant when the disciples sent the children away. “Suffer the little children to come unto me… for of such is the kingdom of God.” (KJV)
    • He took them in His arms and blessed them. That is the picture to hold.
  4. 4

    The Shepherd carries the lambs (Isaiah 40:11)

    • The image is of a strong shepherd, tender with the smallest. The family does not have to be strong right now.
  5. 5

    A short prayer

    • Pray for the parents, siblings and grandparents by name. Pray for sleep, for the first week, for the first year.

Sample lines

Her name was Lily. She had her father’s chin and her mother’s stubborn streak, and in four years she taught this family more about joy than most of us learn in a lifetime.
I will not tell you this makes sense. It does not. I will tell you that Jesus took children into His arms, and that He is holding Lily, and that He is holding you.

What not to say in a funeral sermon

Many well-meant phrases land badly. People in grief hear them as explanations, and they are not looking for explanations. Leave these out:

  • “God needed another angel.” (It can make God sound as though He takes people away to fill a need.)
  • “It was their time.” (It does not feel that way to those left behind.)
  • “Everything happens for a reason.” (Not at a funeral.)
  • “At least they lived a long life,” or “At least they are not suffering.”
  • Any guess about how or why the person died.

Say instead what you know: the person was loved, the loss is real, and God is near to the brokenhearted.

A note on tradition

These outlines assume a Protestant or nondenominational setting. In a Catholic funeral Mass the homily is given by a priest or deacon and focuses on the Resurrection rather than the life of the deceased. In an Orthodox funeral, the service is largely sung and has fixed prayers. If you are not the ordained leader, follow the lead of the family’s pastor or priest.

Putting the whole service together? See the funeral order of service, the complete graveside service script, and Bible verses for a funeral. For the eulogy, see eulogy examples, and for the people who are grieving, condolence messages. The funeral planning hub links everything.

Common questions

How long should a funeral sermon be?

Ten to fifteen minutes is typical, and eight to ten is often better. The family is tired and grieving. A short, clear message of hope will be remembered longer than a long one. For a child’s funeral, keep it to five to eight minutes.

What should you say in a funeral sermon?

Speak about the person with warmth and honesty, acknowledge the grief without rushing past it, and offer the hope of the gospel in simple words. A good structure is: name the loss, tell the truth about the person, read the Scripture, show what it promises, and close with prayer.

What is the difference between a eulogy and a funeral sermon?

A eulogy remembers the person: their life, character and what they meant to those present. A funeral sermon, or homily, proclaims God’s word and the hope of the resurrection to the grieving. At many services both are given, and the sermon usually follows the tributes.

What are the best Scripture passages for a funeral sermon?

Common choices are Psalm 23, John 11:25–26, John 14:1–3, Romans 8:31–39, 1 Corinthians 15, 2 Corinthians 5:1–8, 1 Thessalonians 4:13–18 and Revelation 21:1–4. Choose a passage that fits the person and the family, and one you can say something simple and true about.

How do you preach at the funeral of someone whose faith you do not know?

Speak about the goodness you can see, give thanks to God for it, comfort the family, and entrust the person to God’s mercy without claiming certainty either way. Our fourth outline walks through this in detail.

What should you never say at a funeral?

Avoid “God needed another angel,” “It was their time,” “Everything happens for a reason,” “At least they lived a long life,” and anything that explains the death. Grieving people usually hear these as dismissals. Say what you know: the person was loved, the loss is real, and God is near.

I am not a pastor. Can I give the message?

Yes, if the family asks you and you are comfortable. Keep it short, read the Scripture well, say one or two true things, and pray. The outlines on this page are written so a lay leader can use them. The Lay Funeral Leader Kit adds the full order of service and prayers.

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