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Leading the service

Graveside service script: a complete 15-minute service anyone can lead

A graveside service script with gathering words, Scripture, prayer, the committal and a benediction. Type the name below and the whole script is filled in, ready to print or read from your phone.

By Jon Horton · Updated

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Graveside service · about 14 minutes

  1. 1.Gathering words1 min

    Leader

    Friends and family, thank you for being here. We have come to say goodbye to (name), to give thanks for their life, and to place their body in the care of the earth, trusting them to the care of God. Some of us are sad. Some are tired. Some of us feel nothing at all yet. All of that is welcome here. We do not do this alone. Hear the words of Jesus. “I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live: and whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die.” (John 11:25–26, KJV)

    For the leader: Stand where everyone can hear you, usually at the head of the grave. Pause for a breath after “we do not do this alone.”

  2. 2.Opening prayer1 min

    Leader

    Let us pray. Gracious God, you are the giver of every life, and you are close to everyone who grieves. We thank you for (name), for the years you gave them to us, and for every way (name) loved us. Be near to this family. Give us strength to say goodbye, and a hope that is stronger than our sorrow. We place (name) in your hands, and ourselves with them. Amen.

    For the leader: Any Christian tradition. Bow your head, and others will follow.

  3. 3.Scripture reading2 min

    Reader

    Psalm 23 (King James Version) The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters. He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the LORD for ever.

    For the leader: You may read this yourself or ask a family member in advance. Shorter alternatives: John 14:1–3 or Romans 8:38–39 (both below in this guide).

  4. 4.Words of remembrance3 min

    Leader

    We could say many things about (name). We will say only a few, and the rest we will carry home with us. Take a moment, right where you are, and think of one thing you will always remember about (name). A voice. A habit. A kindness. A joke. (Pause for ten seconds.) If someone would like to say a sentence or two aloud, you are welcome to. Please keep it short, so that everyone who wants to speak has a chance. (After one to three people have spoken:) Thank you. (name) was loved, and (name) is loved still.

    For the leader: Optional. If no one speaks, simply say “Thank you” after the pause. Skipping this adds three minutes back.

  5. 5.The committal2 min

    Leader

    Forasmuch as it hath pleased Almighty God of his great mercy to take unto himself the soul of our dear friend here departed, we therefore commit their body to the ground; earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust; in sure and certain hope of the Resurrection to eternal life, through our Lord Jesus Christ; who shall change our vile body, that it may be like his glorious body, according to the mighty working, whereby he is able to subdue all things to himself. Amen.

    For the leader: This is the traditional wording from the Book of Common Prayer (1662). A plainer version follows. If the person was cremated, say “we commit their ashes to the ground” (or “to the earth”). At the words “earth to earth,” you may scatter a small handful of soil on the casket, or invite the family to place a flower.

  6. 6.The committal, in plain modern words

    Leader

    Almighty God, we entrust (name) to your mercy. We now commit their body to the ground. Earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust, in sure and certain hope of the resurrection to eternal life, through our Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.

    For the leader: Use this instead of the traditional wording above, not as well. It is the same committal in everyday language.

  7. 7.Prayer for the family2 min

    Leader

    Let us pray. Father of mercies and God of all comfort, we ask you to be close to this family. Where there are tears, give them rest. Where there is regret, give them forgiveness. Where there are memories, give them gladness. Hold each person here. Teach us to number our days and to love one another well while we can. We ask this in the name of Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

  8. 8.The Lord’s Prayer1 min

    Leader, then everyone

    As Jesus taught us, let us pray together. Our Father, which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil: For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever. Amen.

    For the leader: This is the King James wording (Matthew 6:9–13). Catholic families usually stop at “deliver us from evil” and then add the doxology (“For the kingdom, the power, and the glory are yours…”). Start it, and the family will carry it in whichever form they know.

  9. 9.Benediction1 min

    Leader

    Now hear this blessing from the book of Numbers. The LORD bless thee, and keep thee: The LORD make his face shine upon thee, and be gracious unto thee: The LORD lift up his countenance upon thee, and give thee peace. Go in peace. Amen.

    For the leader: Numbers 6:24–26, King James Version.

  10. 10.Closing words1 min

    Leader

    Thank you for being here. This service is ended. Please stay as long as you need to. The family invites you to gather together afterward. If you are not sure where, ask any of us and we will point you the right way.

    For the leader: Step back from the grave. The funeral director will usually take it from here.

Before the day: how to prepare

Being asked to lead a graveside service is an honor, and it is also nerve-racking. You do not need to be a pastor. You need a clear script, a calm voice and a few practical details. Here is what to do beforehand:

  1. Talk to the family. Ask what they want, who else should speak, and whether the person had a favorite verse, hymn or saying. Ask about any names to avoid.
  2. Call the funeral director. Confirm the time, where to stand, how long you have, whether there is a microphone, and who will give the signal to begin.
  3. Print the script in large type and bring two copies. A clipboard or a thin folder keeps the pages from blowing in the wind. Use the “Print the script” button above.
  4. Read it aloud once. Time yourself. Mark where to breathe and underline the person’s name.
  5. Assign small jobs. Ask one person to read the Scripture and another to say the Lord’s Prayer with you. Ask someone to hold an umbrella if rain is possible.

Tips for leading with a steady voice

  • Slow down. Outdoors, in wind and with grief, a calm pace carries farther than a loud one.
  • Pause often. After the name. After the committal. Silence is part of the service.
  • It is fine to cry. If your voice breaks, pause and begin again. No one is grading you.
  • Hold the script, not your emotions. The words will carry the service even on days when you cannot.
  • Know your cues. You begin when the funeral director nods. You end when you say, “This service is ended.”

If the person was cremated

The graveside service for cremated remains is the same. Replace “body” with “ashes” in the committal: “we therefore commit his ashes to the ground; earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust.” If the remains are being placed in a niche or scattered at a family place, say “we commit his ashes to the elements” or “to the care of the earth,” as the family prefers. The funeral director or cemetery will tell you what is allowed at that location.

Other readings you can use

Psalm 23 is the most common Scripture at a graveside, but you may want something shorter or different. These are in the King James Version, which is in the public domain.

John 14:1–3 (KJV)

Let not your heart be troubled: ye believe in God, believe also in me. In my Father’s house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there ye may be also.

Romans 8:38–39 (KJV)

For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Revelation 21:4 (KJV)

And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.

More options are in Bible verses for a funeral.

Different traditions and families

The script above works in most Protestant and nondenominational settings, and for many Catholic, Orthodox and Anglican families as a simple, respectful service. A few notes:

  • Catholic. The Rite of Committal is led by a priest or deacon where possible, using the Order of Christian Funerals. If a lay leader will lead, check with the parish first. The Lord’s Prayer is usually said, and the family may also pray the Hail Mary.
  • Orthodox. Orthodox burial services have their own prayers and singing. Speak with the family’s priest.
  • Military or first responder. Honors (flag folding, taps, a gun salute) are arranged through the funeral director. Ask where they fit in the order, usually after the committal.
  • Mixed or non-religious families. Use the non-religious version. It is respectful of everyone and can still include a poem and a moment of silence.

Working out what comes before the graveside? See the funeral order of service, and if you will give the message yourself, the funeral sermon outlines. For the program that goes with it, there are editable funeral program templates.

Common questions

How long is a graveside service?

A graveside service usually lasts 10 to 20 minutes. The script on this page runs about 15 minutes with a short time for remembering, and it can be shortened to ten by skipping the words of remembrance and one reading.

What do you say at a graveside service?

A typical graveside service has a welcome, an opening prayer, a Scripture reading such as Psalm 23, a few words of remembrance, the committal (“earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust”), a prayer, the Lord’s Prayer and a benediction. The script above gives the exact words.

Who can lead a graveside service?

Anyone the family asks. A pastor or priest usually does, but a family member, friend, deacon, elder or lay leader may lead. Read slowly and keep a printed copy in your hand. If the family is Catholic, check with the parish about who may lead the Rite of Committal.

What are the committal words at a graveside?

The traditional committal comes from the Book of Common Prayer: “we therefore commit his body to the ground; earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust; in sure and certain hope of the Resurrection to eternal life, through our Lord Jesus Christ.” The script above has both the traditional wording and a plain modern version.

What if the family is not religious?

Use the non-religious adaptation. It keeps the gathering, a reading or poem, a moment of remembrance, the committal in plain words, and a moment of silence, without prayers or Scripture. Switch the script to “Non-religious family” above.

What should I do if the person was cremated?

The service is the same. Change “body” to “ashes” (or “remains”) in the committal, and place the urn at the graveside or niche.

What does the funeral director do at the graveside?

The funeral director arranges the cemetery, tent and chairs, lowers the casket at the right time and tells you when to begin. Ask them beforehand where to stand, how much time you have, and whether there is a microphone.

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