Funerals
Funeral planning help: plan and lead a funeral, one step at a time
Everything you need to plan a funeral and lead it well: the first seven days, an order of service, an editable program, a eulogy, graveside words and a message of hope. Start where you are.
By Jon Horton · Updated
If you are reading this, someone has died, or is dying, and you have been given a lot to do. That is a hard place to be. Take a breath. A funeral looks like a mountain of decisions, but it is a short list of things done in an order, and most of them can be done by someone you trust.
This is the funeral planning hub for pastor.care. It gathers what we have written for the person planning the service, the person writing the eulogy and the person who was asked to lead it. Free guides are free. A few paid tools are below, for families who want to finish quickly.
Where to start
- The first hours. Make sure the death is officially recorded, call the funeral home, tell the closest family. Everything else can wait a day.
- The shape of the service. Burial or cremation, funeral or memorial, date and place. Ask your pastor. See the funeral order of service.
- The words and the paper. The program, the obituary, the eulogy, the readings.
- The day itself. Someone to lead, someone to speak, someone to hold the family.
- After. Thank-you cards, paperwork, and looking after yourself.
The First Seven Days: a funeral planning checklist
A day-by-day list for the first week after a death: who to call, what to decide, what can wait. Free. We will email it to you to print or keep on your phone.
Free. A few helpful emails, then only what you ask for. Pause or unsubscribe in one click.
When you want to finish quickly
Three tools, each a one-time purchase with instant access and a 30-day refund. No subscriptions, and none of the free guides depend on them.
- $15
For the family making the program
Funeral Program Templates
Twelve editable funeral program designs. Type their name and dates once, and every page arrives filled in. Finish tonight in Canva, Word or Google Docs.
- $25
For the family member who has to speak
Eulogy Writer
Answer guided questions about the person you loved and get a full, personal eulogy draft in your own voice.
- $65
For the friend or lay leader who has been asked to lead
Lay Funeral Leader Kit
Lead a funeral with confidence: order of service, committal words, sermon outlines and the Eulogy Writer included, with their name already in every prayer and script.
Plan the service
Decide what the day will look like and put it on paper.
Write and speak
Find the words for the eulogy and the message.
Lead the service
Scripts, prayers and committal words for whoever stands up.
After the service
Thank people, and care for those who are grieving.
Taking care of yourself
A funeral is an event you carry for weeks. The days before are often busy and numb. The weeks after can be quieter and harder. It is all right to ask friends to bring food, to say no to some tasks and to rest. If your grief feels like more than you can carry, a licensed counselor or a local grief group can help, and you can call or text 988 at any hour.
Common questions
Where do I start when planning a funeral?
Start with the first few hours: make sure the death is officially recorded and call the funeral home. Then decide burial or cremation, the type of service, and a date. Our First Seven Days checklist takes you through it one day at a time, and you can ask a trusted friend to help you with the calls.
What goes into a funeral service?
A typical Christian funeral has music, a prayer, Scripture, a life story, a eulogy or tributes, a short message of hope, prayers and a benediction, followed by a committal at the cemetery. See the funeral order of service for four sample orders with timing.
How do I make a funeral program?
Gather the facts (name, dates, family, order of service, a photo), choose a layout, and type it into an editable template. Our funeral program templates come in 12 designs for Canva, Word and Google Docs, and you can print them at home or at a print shop.
How do I write a eulogy?
Gather a few real memories, choose one story that sums the person up, shape it into an opening, a middle and a close, write it the way you speak, and read it aloud. Our five-step guide and the guided Eulogy Writer help you with each step.
Can a friend or family member lead the funeral?
Yes. Many families ask a trusted friend, elder or lay leader to lead. With a clear order of service and the words for the committal, prayer and benediction, you can lead a dignified service. The Lay Funeral Leader Kit is made for this.
How much does a funeral cost?
Costs vary widely by region and by choices such as burial or cremation. In the US, the FTC’s Funeral Rule gives you the right to an itemized price list from any funeral home, including by phone. Ask for the General Price List and compare before you decide.
Keep reading
- Funeral program templatesEditable funeral program templates for Canva, Word and Google Docs. Finish a beautiful program tonight — instant download, $15.
- Eulogy WriterHow to write a eulogy in 5 steps, with a guided writer that turns your memories into a full, personal draft you can read with confidence.
- Lay Funeral Leader KitAsked to lead a funeral? Order of service, committal words, sermon outlines, prayers and the Eulogy Writer — one $65 kit.
- Eulogy examplesRead full eulogy examples for a mother, father, grandparent, friend and spouse — then write yours with a guided eulogy writer.
- Funeral thank you cardsWhat to write in funeral thank you cards — for flowers, food, donations, pallbearers and the pastor — with a free printable.
- Order of serviceA clear funeral order of service for church, chapel and memorial services — with a printable template and sample wording.